


Losing

by KlivianJade



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: F/M, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-10
Updated: 2019-10-10
Packaged: 2020-11-28 21:15:41
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,838
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20973170
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KlivianJade/pseuds/KlivianJade
Summary: Mara finds herself in a dark place.





	Losing

**Author's Note:**

> Whumptober prompts 9 and 10
> 
> Shackled and Unconscious 
> 
> Probably full of flaws
> 
> Oh and I hate the title.
> 
> Enjoy

Are you deranged like me?  
Are you strange like me?  
Lighting matches just to swallow up the flame like me?  
Do you call yourself a fucking hurricane like me?  
Pointing fingers 'cause you'll never take the blame like me?  
-Halsey

Somehow amidst the chaos, they’d been separated. 

It was supposed to be a routine mission, but then again, wasn’t everything?

Her consciousness came in stages. 

The first time Mara woke, she was disoriented to say the least. Her stomach churned in protest as the drugs ravaged through her nervous system, eating away at her like a plague. She tried in vain to open her eyes, but her body refused to cooperate. Her limbs burned with every labored beat of her heart. She begged for death before she drifted into the eb and flow of darkness once again.

As if the first wave wasn’t enough to end her, the second rivaled the ninth circle of hell. 

The roar of her blood rushing through her head was quickly drowned out by blood curdling, piercing screams. Her hands clawed at her ears in a desperate attempt to silence the hysteria surrounding her, and it took a full minute of the agonizing sound for her to realize that it was coming from her.

She vaguely registered the blood on her fingertips and the glint of a silver restraint circling her wrist before she slipped away once more.

Hours passed, maybe days, before she woke for the third time. 

It was blessedly silent.

She thought for a brief moment that she had died, had finally been released from this suffering. But then the pain came crashing down on her once again like a ton of duracreet.

Forcing her eyes open, she sought out the main source of the pain. The gaping wound in her thigh was a gruesome sight and she didn’t need a medical droid to tell her it was already infected. She probed the wound with a shaking hand and bit back a sob with the realization that she would likely loose the limb, that is if she survived at all. 

Her teeth chattered, adding to the pressure building in her skull as a chilling numbness spread throughout her body. This was the end, of that much she was certain. She would die alone in a dark cell, shivering in a pool of her own blood. It was a death fit for the emperors hand. 

Her eyes began to roll back into her head as she heard the protesting whine of the cell door being forced open. The sounds were muffled. The rustle of clothing, a few muttered curses and something delightfully warm pressed against her cold forehead. She leaned into the touch instinctively.

She felt the warmth of strong arms lifting her off the ground as a wail she didn’t know she had left in her escaped her cracked lips. 

Captor or savior, she didn’t care. As far a as Mara Jade was concerned, she was already dead.

Luke stood outside the medbay doors on the Errant Venture. He hadn’t moved since they brought her in. 

She looked so small and fragile in Wedge’s arms when he carried her out of the shuttle.

It was his fault.

He was supposed to have her back, protect her, and he failed. What good was he if he couldn’t keep her safe?

He could barely feel her now. She was slipping away but the medics refused to let him in. 

They were supposed to retrieve weapon schematics from a hidden Imperial cell on Nar Shada. In and out. Simple. He should have known better. She took a blaster bolt to the leg. One that he failed to deflect. A detonator went off, forming a rift in the ground, knocking him on his back.

Her scream when they dragged her away echoed in his mind on a constant loop. 

If she died, so would he. He couldn’t live with the gaping hole of her absence in his chest. He wouldn’t.

He vaguely registered Wedge approaching him with two cups of caf, hair still damp from a sanisteam. Luke absently wondered how long it took his friend to scrub Mara’s blood from his arms and chest. 

Luke numbly took the proffered cup, more out of habit than intent to drink it. Wedge pulled a flask out of the inside pocket of his flight jacket and emptied the contents into his steaming cup.

“Drink.” He ordered. “It might not help, but it will make me feel better if you do.”

Luke nodded and downed the contents, savoring the burn as it hit his empty stomach. 

“Karrde is on his way. Leia and Han too.” Wedge stated, staring down at his boots the entire time. “She’s gonna pull through.”

“She has to.”

Luke’s eyes never left the medcenter doors as his friend laid a hand on his shoulder before walking away.

The next time Mara woke, there was no pain, only bright lights and the whir of machinery. She felt cleaner now, every inch of her had been polished, blood no longer staining her porcelain skin. 

Her throat was raw as she attempted to swallow, taking note of the mask covering her mouth and nose. She tried to move her fingers and let out a garbled grunt of frustration when her body wouldn’t cooperate.

A 21B droid appeared over her, shining a pen light into her eyes.

“Miss Jade, you’ve just come out of surgery. Try to relax. I’m going to administer something for pain.” The mechanical voice was oddly comforting as a warmth spread throughout her body, sleep taking her once more.

When the medbay doors finally opened, Luke rose from his seat. As the 21B approached, the hushed conversation between Leia and Karrde ceased and Luke could have sworn that everyone was holding their breath. 

“Are you Miss Jade’s next of kin?” He questioned the Jedi. 

“No,” Luke fumbled over his words. “Mara doesn’t have any kin.” He was prepared to dismantle the medical droid if it refused to give him information regarding Mara’s condition. 

Han spoke up from his seat towards the back. “We’re the closest thing to family that Jade has so you better start talking.”

Luke swore he saw his friends hand twitch towards the blaster on his hip.

“Of course,” the droid looked as apologetic as could be expected from one of his kind. “Miss Jade is stable. We were able to cleanse the infection from her bloodstream, however, it was with great difficulty. We encountered a rather potent toxin preventing her blood from clotting. Once we flushed it from her system, we were able to stabilize her body temperature. Several liters of blood product were administered but unfortunately, we were unable to save the injured limb.”

“There was a great deal of damage to the ligaments in her left thigh, but we salvaged what we could. She will need a prosthetic once it is healed but I am afraid we do not have the necessary equipment on board to accommodate Miss Jade at this time. She will need a medical transfer to another facility in the coming days.”

Once 21B finished speaking, Luke sunk back into his chair, trying to absorb the information overload.

“I’ll handle the transfer,” Talon spoke up. “I’ll make sure she receives the best possible prosthetic.”

“Of course, Master Trader.” 21B replied. “Miss Jade will remain in recovery for the next hour before being moved to a room. Master Terrik has instructed us to ensure that she receives the master suite. I can allow one visitor in the recovery room at this moment, but you are all free to visit once she is settled.”

“Skywalker,” Talon addressed the weary Jedi. “You should go. I’ll make the proper arrangements for Mara.”

Luke nodded and followed the medical droid to the recovery room.

She looked so peaceful, laying there with her red gold hair surrounding her like a halo. Luke wanted so desperately to cradle her in his arms but he knew that she needed to recover in peace, so he settled for holding her fragile, bruised hand in his as he sent reassuring waves of the purest force energy over her.

Mara cracked one eyelid open. It took nearly all of her strength to do so but she could feel the strong presence of her best friend, beside her. She mustered what little energy she had to raise her head from the pillow as she removed the oxygen mask from her face.

“Farmboy.”

Her voice was raspy. Hoarse from the breathing tube that had been inserted upon her arrival.

“I’m here Mara. I’m here.” He stroked her hand with his thumb in a poor attempt to calm her nerves. It was like her aura was vibrating with nervousness and he was desperate to soothe it. 

“I need to get out of here.” She raised up, fumbling with the iv in her arm.“

“Mara, wait-“

She cut him off, throwing the sheet back as she attempted to get out of bed.

She was about to swing her legs over the edge of the bed when the entire universe came crashing down on her.

“Gods. My—“ she couldn’t finish her sentence as the gravity of her injury hit her square in the chest. She couldn’t breathe. Her world started to spin when Luke grabbed her arms, grounding her.

“It’s going to be alright. Karrde is making sure you get the best prosthetic available.” 

He fumbled once again over his words. “I know it won’t be the same...trust me, it never will, but it will be functional.”

Silence.

“Mara,” he pleaded. “Talk to me.”

“It’s...” she struggled to vocalize the sense of loss burrowed deep in her chest. “I cant...gods!” She shook herself. “I know I should be grateful to be alive but this...”

Their conversation was interrupted by 21B, insisting that Mara rest. Everything else would simply have to wait.

..Three weeks later..

“Come on Mara! You can do better than that!” Corran Horn taunted her as he dodged the ex-assassins blows for once in his life.

Mara silenced the cocky Corellian with a roundhouse kick to the jaw.

“How does the mat taste Horn?” She taunted her friend, practically giddy that she had finally floored him.

She had struggled immensely when she first received her prosthetic leg, both physically and mentally, but for reasons she chose not to admit, Yavin IV had been good to her. More than good, in fact.

She was just about to rub Corran’s nose in it when she felt her farmboy approach.

Her farmboy.

She had yet to admit it out loud, but she was head over heels for a certain Jedi. 

Luke never left her side while she recovered from her injury, slowly coming to terms with her new reality.

She only saw it as a minor inconvenience now, losing her leg, because in the grand scheme of things, she gained something much more precious. 

She smiled as her eyes met his, knowing that the best was yet to come.


End file.
